Why I Don't Blog

I started blogging, found it cathartic and enjoyed sharing with others. But I stopped and below are some reasons why.

I'm a private person
There are many things I want to write about but most of them involve my personal life, my close friends and my family. I don't want to lose my privacy or invade the privacy of those close to me. Some things are just too personal to put out there in cyberspace for all to read, judge and possibly condemn. I don't want to embarrass anyone, especially myself. Another privacy issue is around identity theft. I'd love to blog about my first dog, my first car, my first grade teacher, my first girlfriend - but all that information turns out to be answers to security questions that will allow anyone to access various online accounts that I obviously want to keep secure. Such thoughts probably don't bother most people (or even enter their mind), but I worry. A lot. About lots of things. Someone called me a hypochondriac once and I thought they meant I was using drugs with a needle (!) I looked it up. And it's true! Yep, I worry. And for the record, I can't stand the site of needles and practically pass out just to have a blood test.

I'm a perfectionist
Well, not really. But I don't want to post stuff that isn't complete, doesn't have all the quotes, references and photos posted to illustrate the story, hasn't been proofread or polished. I also don't want to publish stuff people will read and think, "so what?". What means something to me, doesn't mean much to anyone else. I don't want people to think I'm a narcissist either. (And yes, I know what that one means.)

I'm losing my mind
Again, not really, but... My concern is that my memory of things may not always be the absolute truth. Just my recollection. And some things I write can be what I imagine they are and not what other folks believe to be reality. Some of this is selective memory, some just 'mis-remembered' (ask Roger Clemens and Andy Petite about that!), some sheer fabrication that I wished was true, perhaps. Perception is reality, they say. But maybe I am mis-remembering that truism, as well.

I don't have 'the time'
In other words, I'm lazy. I think of things to write about and start or jot down notes but never finish. Because of the reasons above I rationalize that I'll leave it for now and get back to it 'some other time'. Later. Like, tomorrow... and we all know tomorrow never comes.

Tomorrow, I'll follow this up with a pep talk for myself that I read in a book about writing memoirs. It addresses each one of the concerns above.

In closing, here's a quote I memorized my senior year in college in Professor --'s Shakespeare class. I actually got an 'A' in this class, but took it Pass/Fail because I just wanted to enjoy it. I did.

"To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps by in it's petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
For life is but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing."

— Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 5, lines 17-28)

Yours,
--BriefCandle;